Clicking

Life is good. My Honey is awesome. My boys are healthy and happy. My mind is clear. Life is truly good.

Things seem to be finally clicking. Problems are working themselves out in my family (I don't think the drama will ever fully go away but I accept that now). Money is money but it doesn't stress me out...it never really has but I feel led to say something about it because we should never let money be a source of negative energy in our lives. My house is coming together nicely. We have two (slightly three with all the pots) gardens that are doing marvelous. I wasn't into gardening but decided I should be because my Honey loved it so much. I found out I really do like it. It is very soothing and fun. You feel good knowing you are using your own homegrown ingredients for food. LOVE it. I love the inside of my house. I'm very eclectic and I love it. It's always changing and that suits me just fine.

Julian and I seem to be more in love now than ever before. I love growing older with him. He is my anchor and I am so thankful to have him.

Lately I have noticed how much I have matured. Taking a few months to pull myself together has done wonders. I really made sure I was doing what I needed to do to nurture the things that were most important to me and it has paid off nicely. Relationships needed some TLC and now they are doing much better. My head is on straight and I can see more clearly now. Life is always going to challenge us and I want to have fun during those times. I want my days filled with love, laughter, smiles, hugs, and kisses. It got to a point where those things were missing. Needless to say those were not fun days. Things are so much better now. SO much.

Thank you God for never leaving me and always being constant. Thank you for Your living word.

My Baby is Two

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AIDEN!!

You turn two today. Two years and three hours ago you came into our world. You had the cutest cry that had me worried. It was so loud and high pitched. You had brown hair and were beautiful. I loved you the moment I saw you. Truth be told, I loved you the moment I knew I was carrying you in my belly.

You have brought such joy to our lives. You have a gorgeous smile with bright eyes. You look just like your Daddy and you have his behaviour too. You are a risk taker and don't look back. You act without thinking and have no regrets. I hope that you become just like your Daddy when you grow up. I love him with all that I am and I love you just as much.

You are my world and I thank you for all the wonderful things that you have taught me. I couldn't imagine my life without my Eh-geh in it.

nnnga

Mundane

Sometimes it's so nice to find the joy in the mundane everyday!

I find joy in my God, my husband, my kids, my pets, my garden, my life.

I love you Julian. I love you Tristan. I love you Aiden.

Every day we make a choice. A choice to be happy or a choice to be unhappy. I choose Happy today. I choose Joy. I choose Love.

To Be or Not To Be ...

Guilty that is. Sometimes I feel guilty about certain rules I want enforced, other times I don't.

Here is an example: I don't like toys out in the living areas of the house. Living, as in social gathering areas, like the kitchen, dining room, and living room. The boys have their own side of the house which includes two rooms, a bathroom, and a hallway. Plenty of space with PLENTY of toys. I know why they keep bringing out into the living room but that doesn't mean I have to like it. Today Tristan brought six, yes SIX, trains out into the living room while I was trying to vacuum. I told him to take his trains back into the room where the train table (with tracks and everything) was. I started to feel guilty about that, as if I should let him have his toys wherever he wants, because in the big picture it doesn't really hurt anyone. But then I remembered that I gave them HALF of my house to play with toys.

Why does the guilt always have to be there? I know I'm not out of line enforcing rules that make sense but the guilt is still there. I do have my reasons for toys not being all over the house by the way. And I've told them thousands of times to keep their toys on their side of the house!!

I love those boys DEARLY (read last post) but sometimes I just wish they would listen a bit better. My lovely lads are no different than any other kids, this I know, but it is just as equally frustrating. Some days are harder than others for us Mommies. Today is one of those days.

Letter to My Tristan and My Aiden

To My Precious, Beautiful, Wonderful Blessings

I love you so incredibly much. These words are from my heart to yours. This song makes me cry every time I hear it because I think of you two and how God knew exactly who to create for me to love unconditionally, not once but twice. Mommy will always love you, Always and Forever! I thank our Heavenly Father every day for both of you.

THIS LITTLE LIGHT OF MINE by Addison Road

There's a little flame inside us all
Some shine bright, some shine small
The rains will come and the waters rise
But don't you ever lose your light

In this life you will know Love and pain, joy and sorrow
So when it hurts, when times get hard
Don't forget whose child you are

This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine, gonna let it shine

May you live each day with no regret
Make the most of every chance you get
Let your eyes get wide when you look at the stars
With the same sense of wonder as a child's heart

With the ones you love treasure the time
And for those who are gone keep their memories alive
Hold on to your dreams don't ever let go
There's a fire inside you burning with hope

There will be days when you want to give up
When the clouds settle in
But after the rain comes the sun
Don't you ever forget

One day there will be no more pain
And we will finally see Jesus' face
So until then I'm gonna try to brave the dark and let my little light shine

There's a little light inside us all

Learning

Learning. It can be fun. It can be exciting. It can be hard. It can be sad. It can be lots of different things. I am learning that life is all about what you make of it. We are here for a purpose. How do we live out that purpose? I'm learning and it is fun, hard, and worth it. Some days are much easier than others but everyday isn't as hard as our minds make it out to be. Christ is ALWAYS with us and He gives us the strength (and tools) to help us through it. I've been looking back at the last year & a half and can now see that God was teaching me something. I can take what was given and do nothing OR I can take it and grow, grow, grow!! I'm going to choose the latter. I would rather see my past as the stepping stones for the future. I will have a better understanding of situations that will come again in life and know how to handle them (better) next time. Of course, I still struggle with certain things but who doesn't? Who doesn't have reoccurring struggles? But now I don't feel so alone. God is good and that's all there is to it.