I haven't blogged in awhile. It's because I'm not quite sure where to start I guess. The easiest way for me to write it down is in list form. I love lists. I really do.

Here we go, it's all random and out of order. I'm going to jot down what comes to my head and you decipher it at your own risk:

*my hubby no longer has a job

*we do not have another job lined up yet

*family drama has gotten out of control

*i'm working on getting it under control

*it's a task too big for me to handle yet i'm still going to try

*my dog is shedding like crazy and it's making me crazy along the way

*Tristan is learning to read and i couldn't be more proud

*Aiden wishes he knew how to read and is just too cute for words when he sits with his books

*we have big, BIG plans for our future but don't know what they are

*Honey and i are really, truly learning what it means to trust God

*our life right now, as we speak, is a testament of our faith and trust in Him

*it's hotter than hot right now and i think i'm going to melt soon

*i've lost 17.2 lbs this summer

*i have lots more to go

*i still can't wear my wedding ring but i'm getting there, slowly but surely

*we got a cat, he is black, his name is Sable

*he is a very, VERY good cat

*my roses are dying and that makes me super sad

*sometimes i feel life is flying by and other times i feel it is at a stand-still

*i'm baking more and cooking less

*i want to cook more

*Honey and i are learning to live on a real, grown-up style budget and it doesn't suck

*menu planning has become increasingly more difficult the healthier i eat

*i'm totally addicted to pinterest

I think that's it.

less is more ... or is it?

Small houses.

That is what is on my mind today. My house is good. It is spacious and both boys have their own room. My master bedroom is huge and the bathroom is FABULOUS!!

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut

I am thinking of smaller. And of less. Less of what? Stuff.

What is important to you? What is important to me? Are what you think is important and what I think is important the same? Probably not. Maybe so. Either way, that's okay.

Everybody has an opinion. But what really matters is what you and your spouse feel is best for you two and y'alls family, right? Or what is best for you if you are single.

Honey and I always dream of one day having a loft in Paris. A LOFT PEOPLE. Loft's are small, cozy, intimate. We want to be together in life and travel and have fun. Make memories with our children. Sometimes you have to have less to have more.

Do you ever watch House Hunters International? Or heard a story where people just took a chance and left everything they know to pursue a dream in a far off place? Did you think to yourself...IDIOTS!!?? Probably not. I tend to think...wow, what risk takers!! What an awesome idea, to just take a chance and do it. What "it" is changes with each couple, person, or family.

I dream of doing that one day; just taking a chance, trusting God, and live out my dream to travel, eat well, and have fun in life with my family.

I am currently figuring out what really matters to me. What I can't live without and what I can live with.

Do you know what you can't live without? What's your dream? Would you be able to live in a small house/space for the sake of living somewhere awesome or having awesome opportunities?

Comforting

Life has been a whirlwind lately.

I have been through *every* emotion possible in the last two weeks. Happy, Sad, Surprised, Frustrated, Joyous, Scared, Calm, Unnerved, Sane, Tired, Excited! I can keep going and going but you get the picture.

Right now, as I sit in front of my little computer with my cup of coffee, my children are watching Jake and the Never land Pirates, cuddling with me in my chair. There isn't enough room for the three of us and I love it. That just means that we sit closer to each other to make up for lack of space. My boys give me kisses about every five minutes and tell me that they love me. They have the purest of hearts and are my true treasures.

I am blessed beyond I ever imagined. I guess I underestimated God. I didn't think He could be (or should be) this good to me. Boy was I wrong. God is bigger than we think and if we think we know how big He is, then we are very wrong. He is bigger. My boys have a Veggie Tales show that talks about how big God is and this song is running through my brain as I type...."God is bigger than the Boogie Man" Haha.

I am going through something right now that gives me an opportunity trust God COMPLETELY. A chance for me to really know He has plans for me that are bigger and better than I could understand at the moment. He is control, not me. He has His glorious, protecting hands around me and my heart. He has my family under His care. He knows what is best for my family. He is love. He is good. He is caring. He is my protector.

My heart calms down when I remember that if I trust Him 100%, I have nothing to worry about. It's nice to know that I don't need to waste my time worrying about the unknown.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:11-13

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:33-34

5.2

Bad Timing

It is always a holiday weekend or when a vacation is coming up that kids get sick. Isn't it stange?

This weekend is the Fourth of July Holiday and this weekend we are going to New Braunfels. Last week my Aiden got super, super sick and it subsided. Then yesterday my two sons (*BOTH of them*) woke up sick. I thought it was allergies but it very quickly turned into Croup. Not good. Not good at all. My MIL is coming in today and the vacation is in a few days. I want them to have so much fun with her. She is wonderful to them and for them. I do NOT want to take sick kids down the river, nor do I want sick kids keeping me from going down the river. This is our ONE time a year that we get to go have fun with my side of the family, out of town, away from the routine of every day.

I hope my babies get well quickly so they can enjoy Grandma's visit (which doesn't happen nearly enough) and family time. If they don't, no vacation for us.

Boys will be Boys

Sometimes I get a feeling that my boys are too rowdy. Sometimes it's they're too loud. Other times it may be they are too rough.

It's okay though. I remind myself I don't need to raise them according to the worlds standards. I need to raise them according to God's standards. God made everyone different. God made them rowdy. God made them loud. God made them PERFECTLY.

My job is to teach them to believe in Him, trust Him, honor Him, and how to use what God gave them in a way that glorifies Him.

It is okay to be loud (where appropriate). It is okay to rough (as long as no one is hurt). It is okay to be boys. It is okay for me to let them be boys.

The world tells me to have children who never yell, hit, bite, or get into trouble. Well, that just isn't going happen. The world can teach me that all they want. God is my teacher. God will help me with what He gave me. God will teach me to teach my sons how life should be and how we should be within the world He created. God will help me when my children yell, hit, bite, or get into trouble because those things will happen.

Life isn't about being polite and proper. Life is about glorifying God and embracing all the gifts He has given us.

I will NOT be embarrassed when my child sings at the top of his lungs in a store "Jesus Loves MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE". He is spreading the Truth. I will NOT be embarrassed when my child passes gas in a movie theater during the quiet time of the show and says "excuse me" rather loudly. He is showing manners. I will NOT be embarrassed when my two sons are a bit loud sometimes when they are playing together. They are showing friendship and love for one another.

Life is too uptight.

God is good.

I'd rather live according to God's standards than to this corrupt, selfish worlds.

2.6